We all claim we want happiness. And yet, many of us are unhappy.
We complain all the time. We fight with family members. We play dirty office politics with co-workers. We shout and scream at other drivers in traffic. We give random people on the street judgmental looks.
“Well, not me! I don’t do that stuff.”
Yes, you do. Why? Because you’re human. I do it too.
Look, we all know how to live a happy life. The formula for happiness is not some kind of secret.
We all know that money, status, fame, or respect does not make us happy. Happiness is a state of mind. It’s something that comes and goes.
One of my readers recently replied this to one of my weekly newsletter emails:
“How are you so positive?”
I thought to myself, “Haven’t I written about this before?” I went through all my articles and the answer is no. I have written about the importance of having a positive mindset a lot.
But after 3,5 years of blogging, this was the first time I got that question. And it’s so on point. Sometimes we take things for granted. Even though I’ve experienced many challenges in life (like almost every other human being), I never gave up my positive mindset.
One of the most popular ideas in personal development is that all successful people have achieved mastery. Many of us believe in this false notion that you have to master a skill to achieve career success.
That’s because we, as a society, admire and glorify winners. We look at billionaires, champions, gold medalists, and other outliers. I must admit, there are many lessons we can learn from people who are masters at one particular skill.
But at the same time, it’s very daunting. Let’s be real, not everyone wants to spend 10 or 20 thousand hours to master a skill. We all have other things we value in life: Our family, friends, hobbies, health, you name it.
So when people write books and articles about outliers, we might get inspired, but from a practical point of view, the advice is useless. Not because we can’t apply the advice—most of the time, we don’t WANT to.