Do you ever feel that business as a whole can be hostile? Maybe you have a boss that doesn’t appreciate you. Or a client that treats you like dirt.
No matter what your place is on the career ladder, I bet you’ve felt misunderstood somewhere in your career. Every day people feel left out, unappreciated, and mistreated at work. And consequently, they suffer.
Let’s face it. Business is not always fun. And sure, it’s business.
But I think we can easily improve the business landscape by getting better at one thing: Emotional Intelligence.
Everyone has heard of it. But what is it? How do you get better at it? And how can you use it to get better at business?
Emotional intelligence (EI) is a term that’s been popularized by John Mayer, from the University of New Hampshire, and Yale’s Peter Salovey.
There’s a difference between what we say and what we do. It’s called reality.
We say a lot of things:
- “I don’t want to be that guy who can’t climb two flights of stairs.”
- “I want to have a close family.”
- “I want to help and inspire people.”
- “I want to buy a house for my parents.”
There’s nothing wrong with that. Most of us have nothing but good intentions.
However, good intentions mean nothing. You can’t pay your bills with good intentions. We know that making a living is hard. And living a great life is even more difficult.
So every day we hustle, work hard, and do our best to get closer to our dreams.
Have you ever worked with a person so nasty that you hated going to work? It’s sad, but some people can spoil everything.
In an ideal world, people would treat others with respect, patience, and kindness. I think that’s what we’re meant to do as humans beings.
Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor from 161 til 180, and once the most powerful man on earth, said it best:
“In a sense, people are our proper occupation. Our job is to do them good and put up with them.”
But in real life, things are a bit different. Most of us face bullies, backstabbers, and arses who don’t respect others on a daily basis. In other words: Assholes are everywhere.
But Robert Sutton, author of The Asshole Survival Guide, is committed to change that.
Do you have a long list of goals, desires, and wants for your life? Do you want to learn more? Earn more? Improve your skills? Get the most out of your relationships? Live better?
All those things are good. Life is about moving forward and making consistent progress.
However, there’s one important thing about all this working, hustling, striving, and achieving more: You can’t do everything at the same time.
Episode 15 of The Darius Foroux show features an audio version of my article about career mistakes. Believe me, I’ve made a lot of unnecessary mistakes. Unnecessary because these are mistakes I could have easily avoided if I learned more from other people’s mistakes. Enjoy!
And in case you’d like to read along, I’ve posted the full article below.
Do you ever think, “who cares about anything that I have to say?”
Every time you have a similar thought like that, you’re developing imposter syndrome. There are many ways imposter syndrome expresses itself in your mind:
- “If I fail this, I will lose everything.”
- “What if people call me out?”
“I feel like a fake. I’m not the right person to talk about this.”
After these type of thoughts, we often try to downplay the effects:
- “It’s not a big deal.”
- “No one cares anyway.”
- “It’s a matter of luck, anyway.”
Those secondary thoughts are just a defense mechanism. We try to convince ourselves that our work isn’t important and that no one cares. We experience imposter syndrome when we have to lead people, share our ideas, give advice, etc.