How To Build The Self-Confidence You Need To Win At Life

Do you ever feel shitty about yourself? It happens all the time to most of us.

It seems like everyone is building billion-dollar businesses, becoming YouTube stars, or making it big on Instagram.

Deep down, most of us also know that it’s 99% bullshit. But at the same time, we see all these people living awesome lives, and we don’t care if it’s real or not.

Whether you want money, fame, travel, or none of that stuff, it doesn’t matter because it always comes down to this: How confident are you?

  • Are you confident enough to say “fuck it,” and pursue you dream?
  • Are you confident enough to say “fuck all this bullshit, I don’t need it,” and stay grounded?

You see? Self-confidence is important if you want to win at life — no matter what you’re after, a lack of confidence will always hold you back.

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Why I Decided To Quit My Corporate Job 365 Days Ago

Exactly one year ago on this day, March 31st, I decided to quit my well-paying job at a large IT research & advisory firm. I remember it vividly because I felt like shit — stuck in a life that I never wanted.

Having a job is like having a relationship. There are two camps of people.

  1. People who say that Mr. Right doesn’t exist — there’s only Mr. Right Now.
  2. And then there are the romantics who believe in true and unconditional love. Love where there is no hate involved— ever.

I’m number 2. I wasn’t really in love with my job. It was okay — she had good looks, took care of me, and made sure I wasn’t alone. So I said: Let’s give it a try.

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Little Things Are Big Things

  • “I’ll just have one candy bar.”
  • “I’m going out just this once.”
  • “I’m going to skip the gym just today.”
  • “I’m going to watch only one House of Cards episode.”
  • “I’m going to play 20 minutes of Call of Duty.”
  • “I’m going to read that book another time.”
  • “I’m going to relax just for one day.”
  • “I’m going to have just one more drink.”
  • “I’m going to sleep in today.”

We often think that it doesn’t hurt to skip the little things in life. We know that it’s better to exercise, read, or work on our skills every day.

We also know that it’s better to eat healthy, don’t drink a lot of alcohol, and don’t waste our time complaining of feeling hurt. But all of that stuff is boring. And it doesn’t hurt to skip the little and boring stuff, right?

Well, little things add up to big things. Positive and negative. Skip enough little things and you will never see results. But when you keep doing the little things—it will pay off.

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Take People’s Advice With A Grain Of Salt

People love to give and receive advice. We do it all the time. And it’s a good thing — no one in this world has all the answers to everything.

Most people mean well, but sometimes, the advice works counterproductive. Especially when you ask advice from various people and everyone tells you something different.

Result? Confusion — which is never helpful.

Take college. One person says it’s useless; the other says it’s necessary. If you’re currently deciding whether to go to college or not, other people’s advice will probably not help you.

And this is true for most things in life. That’s why there are a few things to keep in mind when you’re asking people for advice.

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Stop Making These 15 Excuses That Are Holding You Back

We all make harmless excuses to get out of things we’re not in the mood for.

We say things like: “Honey, I’m too tired.” “I have a doctor’s appointment.” “I have a spinning class.”

Those things are excuses for: You’re not in the mood, you’re perfectly healthy and want to get out of something, and by ‘spinning class’, you mean watching an episode of House of Cards.

Not a big deal. Those excuses are not bad, but we also make other excuses, that mess up our life.

We say things like: “I would start a business, but I can’t get $100K of starting capital.”

For years, I’ve made up all kinds of excuses for the things that I wanted to do. The truth is that I was just scared. And because of that, you never start.

But it’s also an easy way to fool yourself that you are not the problem, it’s something or someone else. We do anything to say: “I’m not the problem.”

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How To Find Mentors

Before there were books, universities, or classes, there were mentorships to pass on wisdom and knowledge. In the west, mentorships exist since the Ancient Greek times—it’s a tried method of learning.

Sometimes people mix up apprenticeships and mentorships. An apprenticeship is basically an internship, which is a system that was created in the Middle Ages.

If you wanted to become a tailor, baker, or merchant, you became an apprentice first and learned the craft on the job.

The main difference between the two is that mentorships are informal. And that’s exactly what makes it difficult to find a mentor.

Most people understand the value of mentors, but finding one is not easy. I also didn’t have mentors until I was out of college.

But in the past six years, I’ve been lucky to cross paths with three great people, who became mentors to me, and taught me invaluable lessons.

There are also several other people that I speak to every once in a while — we exchange ideas, and share knowledge—they are also like mentors. So mentors come in many types of relationships.

Here are seven things I learned about finding a mentor.

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The Opportunist’s Guide To Failure

The Opportunist’s Guide To Failure

If you boil down most people’s challenges to one thing, it’s fear. And for most of us, it’s the fear of failure.

What happens if you fail at school? What if your business fails? What if you don’t make it as a professional athlete? How about failing in your relationships?

I could go on like that for a few hours. But have you ever ‘really’ thought about it? I mean in a practical way. What could happen if you fail?

Here are 3 scenarios — you decide which one’s the best.

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